Running on Empty

Have been running for a decade now..Have been my own parent..have been my guiding star..have been very driven..was very aware of the fact that if I screwed up I would have no safety net to fall on..I hear my peers having animated conversations about their teenage years and I sit and wonder what was I doing at that age..where did my wonder years go? will I have enough stories to tell my children? do I have enough memories of how I used to be?As a child, dreams were my only escape and I escaped alot....I had a picture of me..of how I was going to turn out..I am that picture now..its a mixed feeling..I have great respect for that little girl because she believed that she could do the impossible..and she did...and now I have turned into this person that doubts everything about me...maybe I need a fresh set of impossible dreams and I will start believing again...I have been a muse for so many people..I guess I need to be my own muse now..So dont get me wrong if you cannot find me..I am a work in progress...constant evolution is my trait..dont be surprised if you cannot recognize me...its not your fault..I have changed..yet again..........