The gift of Friendship..

I am going through a period of absolute numbness. Days are just flying by ,like fine sand escaping the grasps of my palm. I dont feel like the person I used to be, I dont feel like talking to anybody, I dont feel like facing the world, nothing makes me smile, I feel like crying all the time. I just wanted to be with myself isolated in this self-created island of misery.

But then I realized I am not alone. My friends actually do care for me. My friends actually love me. My friends miss the way I used to be and its unfair for me to lock myself away and think that nobody will notice. Its actually insulting their friendship and their feelings for me.

They say everything is fair in love and war. But they never said everything is fair in friendship. Love comes and goes. Love is conditional. Friendship is not. Friendship stays forever inspite of circumstances, differences, friendship is kind, friendship does not judge you, friends stick to one another no matter what, friendship never ends, friends never betray you or manipulate circumstances to their advantage, true friends would risk everything to save their friend from destruction. Friends are like good habits, they are hard to cultivate, but once they are entwined in your psyche, they are there forever. True friends are like mirrors, they will always reflect your truth. It is our folly if we refuse to see the truth, it is our fault if we choose to ignore reality. It was not their mistake to tell us the truth even if the truth was brutally bitter. Most truths usually are...

So my ex-boyfriend who claimed that he loved me more than anything in this world, now does not care a damn as to how I feel , but my best friend with whom I always agree to disagree and to who I was giving the cold shoulder for a week, because I felt he didnt care for me enough was the only one who actually cares, was the only one who spent his whole day trying to find out what was going on in my head, and when he could not get through to me, he got another of my friend to jointly talk sense to me in a gentle way. Because he cares.. Because it hurts him to see me hurting. Because it hurts him to know that he cannot do anything to help.

I now realize that people show love and affection in their own way and it is myopic on our part to not see it just because it was presented in a different way. Actions speak louder than words. We are defined by our actions and not by what we speak of doing.


I think the only thing that makes me feel anything is kindness bestowed upon me by my true friends. This is a big thank you to everyone who has touched me with a smile, good advice, offered me comfort, and made me believe that it was ok to be me....All I need are my friends and their love and I know I can get by..