My Father's Songs:Badi Hai Beqarari: Jeevan Sandhya

Badi hai beqarari
Hai har ek saans gaali
Kise dhoondhoon pukaroon
Mere jeevan ke saathi

Yeh tanhayi ka mausam
Jaha sab tham gaya hai
baraf ki sard chadar mein
sabhi kuch jam gaya hai

Aawaze hi aawaze
Na jaane tum kaha ho
Jara aawaz do mujhko
Kaha tak main pukaru

Badi hai beqarari
Hai har ek saas gali

This song was composed by my father for Mahesh Bhatt's telefilm 'Jeevan Sandhya'and was sung by the legendary Kishore Kumar. This movie also featured my Dad's favorite actress of all time- Waheeda Rahman.

I was really young when Dad composed this song and I had no idea about the depth and the meaning of this melody. But that was nearly 2 decades ago, and time changes everything does'nt it?

Sometimes when I feel lonely, lost, alone and vulnerable in the place I call home, I find myself humming this song and then the meaning, the depth, the feelings dawn upon me, and that is what makes this song so beautiful. Because its real. The melody is. The lyrics are. When you miss someone so much that every breath you take is like a curse because you are without your love, thats when you will want to sing this song.

Badi hai beqarari...